How often do we meet?
In the beginning, we typically meet weekly. This gives focus to our work and helps you get the most out of our sessions. You want to have time between sessions to implement what you’ve learned, but not so much time that we lose momentum. After a strong foundation is built, we often transition to meet less often, such as every other week, then every three to four weeks. I often joke that my goal is to become obsolete, but it’s true! As soon as I become obsolete, it means our work together has been successful.
How long is each session?
This length of time allows you to get the most out of our sessions while remaining focused - it's about efficiency and effectiveness.
Please note that, unlike couples therapy,
Discernment Counseling begins with a 2-hour initial session, then subsequent sessions are 90 minutes.
What are your rates?
Couples Therapy: $185 per 75-minute session
Discernment Counseling: $300 for initial 2-hour session, then $225 for subsequent 90-minute sessions
Is therapy worth the cost?
That depends! For many, yes. For some, no. Ultimately, that’s a question only you can answer for yourself.
Couples therapy is not inexpensive, yet it’s effective. Like anything else, it is important for you to consider how important your goals are
to you in order to determine if the investment is worthwhile for you. You need to weigh the potential benefits if you do therapy against the potential outcomes if you don't do therapy. I believe wholeheartedly in the usefulness of our work together - that’s why I do it! - and one of my core beliefs is to always offer more value than I receive in compensation (that way, everyone wins).
Will couples therapy be reimbursed by my insurance company?
Couples therapy is not typically covered by insurance companies.
Nevertheless, I can provide you with a Superbill, which you can submit to your insurance company to see if they will reimburse a portion of your payment. Please note, however, that I do not provide diagnostic "codes" for insurance filings because, in couples therapy, there is not one patient with a presenting problem; instead, both partners are working together on their relationship issues.
Do you accept insurance?
I can, however, provide you with a Superbill, which is a receipt. You can then submit the Superbill to your insurance company, who
may reimburse a portion of your payment (see below).
What payment methods do you accept?
All major credit cards (i.e., Visa, Mastercard, American Express, Discover).
For ease and convenience, your card will be automatically charged at the end of each session through the secure, online portal.
What if I need to reschedule?
No problem. If you cancel or reschedule your session with at least 48 hours’ notice, there is no fee. If you cancel or reschedule within 48 hours of your scheduled time, or if you do not show for your scheduled appointment, you will be charged the rate of your scheduled session. If it's a true emergency, that's a different story.
Why the charge? The late-cancellation charge is there because I set aside a specific time just for you, and it’s difficult to coordinate for another couple to use that time slot with such short notice.
Can I use my Health Savings Account (HSA) or Flexible Spending Account (FSA)?
Most HSA/FSA accounts come with a debit card that is linked to the account (or you reimburse yourself from the account). On my end, I am able to charge your card just as I would with a credit card. It is up to you, however, to check with your accountant and your HSA/FSA administrator to determine whether or not the services rendered are considered a qualified medical expense.
Do you work with individuals?
No, just couples. The exception is
Hopeful Spouse Counseling - a short and focused approach to help someone work to save their marriage when their partner is not interested in couples work.
Do you work with kids or families?
No, I only work with couples. Some therapists work with people across the lifespan; other specialize. My training, experience, and focus is working with couples. This sometimes involves parenting issues, of course, but I refer out to a child/adolescent therapist if your child needs help, or I refer out to a family therapist if that is needed.
How do I start working with you?
It’s simple. It all starts with a free, 20-minute phone consultation.
During this call, I’ll ask a few questions about your background and goals—and, importantly, you can ask questions of me—so we can see if we’re a good fit to work together. If we are a good fit, we'll discuss logistics and get you scheduled as soon as possible. If, for whatever reason, it's not a good fit, I'll do my best to point you in the right direction.
Call me. I'm happy to answer any further questions you may have.
Do you offer online therapy?
In response to COVID-19, all my sessions are currently conducted through a secure, HIPAA-compliant platform. On your end, it will feel like a Zoom or Skype call, but the platform is more secure.
What technology do I need for online therapy?
You will need a few things to ensure our online sessions are successful:
1. A computer, tablet, or smartphone;
2. An internet connection;
3. A private location.
Is online therapy effective?
Research indicates that telehealth sessions are just as useful as in-person sessions for individuals. There is less research available on the effectiveness of telehealth for couples, but the research that is available is promising. In my own experience, I’ve found that many couples prefer telehealth. Why?
1. It's convenient: you don't have to commute to my office, which saves you time.
2. You're in your own environment, which is comforting for many people (especially if you have pets!).
3. You're less likely to need a babysitter.
4. The changes you make in our session may better translate outside of our sessions, since the therapy is not taking place in a separate location from the everyday environment where you interact with your partner.
What if I'm not sure if I should stay in a relationship?
If you're unsure about your commitment level, or if you're not sure that therapy can help your relationship, couples therapy may not be the best fit for you at this time. If you or your partner are contemplating separation, Discernment Counseling may be a better fit for you. Regardless, I can provide a phone consultation to help you explore the options available to you, so you can receive the appropriate support.
Will you push your religious beliefs on me?
No. I will never push an agenda on you or make you uncomfortable with faith-based remarks that you don't yourself bring to the table. I respect you and your worldview. As a therapist, I use clinical, evidence-based interventions that are compatible with diverse belief systems.
Will you respect my religious or spiritual beliefs?
Yes! As a therapist, my role is to incorporate your worldview into the therapy process. I will not judge you or your beliefs. Although I am not trained in any type of pastoral counseling, we will do our best to incorporate your belief system into our work together.
Do you work with same-sex couples?
Yes! My mission is to help couples heal and strengthen their relationship, whether they identify as LGBTQIA or not. This is a safe place.
Are you sex-positive, BDSM & kink friendly?
Yes! I support people’s right to sexual expression in whatever way they choose, so long as it's consensual. This is a safe place.
What if my partner won't come to couples therapy?
You have a few options, depending on the reason your partner is not interested in joining you for couples therapy. If your partner is ambivalent about the relationship and is considering separation, you may be a good fit for Discernment Counseling. If your partner is considering separation and they are unwilling to do Discernment Counseling, and you want to save your relationship, you may be a good fit for Hopeful Spouse Counseling. If your partner is simply unsure about the need for couples therapy or if they are uncomfortable with the idea, you can see if they are willing to do a phone consultation. You can also explore seeing someone for individual therapy to make changes on your own, which may inspire your partner to join you for couples therapy. Regardless, I am happy to provide a phone consultation to help you explore your options.
How do I know if you're the right therapist for me?
When choosing a therapist, there are many factors to consider. While I wish I was the best therapist for everyone, the truth is, finding the right therapist is a very personal decision. Training and experience are important factors; so is your comfort level with the therapist. Fortunately, we have many excellent couples therapists in the area, so I am happy to point you in the right direction if, for whatever reason, we are not a good fit. I work with a limited number of clients in order to ensure the best quality of care - this also takes the pressure off, since it allows us to make sure it’s truly a good fit if we do decide to work together. Check out the rest of my website to learn more about me, my background, and my work. If you are ready to see if we're a good fit, the next step is to schedule a free, initial phone consultation.
How long will I be in couples therapy?
Therapy length depends on your goals and the complexity of your case. Some prefer to address short-term goals over the course of 3-6 months; others have more complex needs that require more time (6 months or more).
It is important to note that couples usually find themselves entrenched in unhealthy communication patterns that have been established over the course of many years, so it is not an overnight journey. At the same time, your time and money are valuable, not to mention your emotional energy. I strive to help couples in as brief a period of time as possible while respecting the complexity of the issues. During the course of our work together, I will provide my professional recommendation as to the length of our work together; however, you are free to end therapy at any time. If you need additional clarity, we can discuss it further during our phone consultation or in our first meeting to ensure we are on the same page.
Please note that, unlike couples therapy,
Discernment Counseling and
Hopeful Spouse Counseling are short-term interventions of up to 5 sessions.
Will you encourage us to divorce or separate?
No. During couples therapy, the assumption is that you both want to work on your relationship, so my stance will be to support you in doing that. It's not a 'compatability test'.
If you or your partner is ambivalent about staying in the relationship, Discernment Counseling takes a more nuanced stance in order to respect the complexity of your situation. See my
values statement for more information regarding my stance on marriage, therapy, and divorce.